-Friday, April 01, 2005-

am i high maintainence?

i guess i am. i get upset easily. feel lousy easily. but i get positive and happie easily too. just a small lil kind gesture can make my day. but sometimes, i just feel v sad becos it seems that people dun reciprocate my friendship to them, if u get what i mean. seriously i cant expect everyone to like me, in fact i know that i do haf traits that upsets people. however i do try to be the best i can. but mani times i still get sad easily. why.

everyone is confusing. they all confuse me. everyone is so different. if i treat everyone the same, it doesn't guarantee the same response u know? so it's pointless treating everyone equalli right? i hate living in my own world and living on my own. but sometimes the pursuit of community living, building interpersonal relationships is so tough n so hurting. n for someone like me, the hurt escalates.. i haf 2 admit i'm more sensitive den most others. can i just ignore. there must b a reason y i am made the way i am.

it's painful, when u love someone, but the someone doesn't know. n all u can do is love tat person quietly, and trying to help the person the best u can, but yet keep the distance. is it silly? or issit just the way love is? love shld be happie n not painful, right? this is so confusing. contradicting.

mayling signed off at
|12:04:00 AM|

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